As you go through your reboot, you need to regularly ask yourself, “Who do I need to become to get to the next level of my reboot?”
As men progress through their reboot, they eventually reach a point where they see different results. They’re no longer masturbating compulsively. Oftentimes they’ve completely stopped viewing pornography or even lost interest in it. Then a lot of behaviors that triggered them before drop off. Eventually, the fear of slips and relapses even leaves.
Once you reach these various points, you might feel a bit bored and restless. You’re wondering what comes next. You feel like you’re ready to move onto the next level of the system but that isn’t always the case. When you’re ready to move into the next stage of your reboot, you first need to find out if you’ve normalized.
What is reboot normalizing, though?
Reboot normalizing is basically taking what you previously viewed as a good result and making it average. You want to carry out behaviors that felt exceptional when you first started doing them until they start feeling normal. It’s getting to a point where things that were once difficult to do are now habitual.
For example, say you’re in a committed relationship or a marriage. One of your biggest triggers was when a former girlfriend or lover texted you. Your initial instinct was to respond or even act out. But as you progressed through your reboot, you learned that you no longer need to go through that emotional reaction. At first this felt nearly impossible but over time it became a normal, rational response.
There are certain criteria at each stage that you can use as guideposts for reboot normalizing. I’ve outlined these before in a series where I broke down the Porn Reboot system. These signs of progress add up over time until you’re behaving in a way you never thought possible at the beginning.
There’s nothing wrong with experiencing the excitement of the first time you overcome an urge or mitigate a trigger. It’s a new thing that felt impossible when you first arrived. But to develop long-term success with your reboot, these exciting moments need to become a normal and routine thing for you.
Reboot normalizing is a sign that you’re headed in the right direction. You might feel bored or restless for a moment. Everyone new to the system reaches that point from time to time. As you realize the next steps you need to take, though, you’ll find yourself charged up and ready to take on what you need to do next.
Eventually you reach the stage where restlessness and boredom are a thing of the past. You build up such a full life that there’s little time to even think of feeling bored. As your ceiling gets higher, you progress further each time. You’re eating well, going to the gym, being productive at work, building a solid network of friends, engaging with your partner or family, or going out to find a healthy relationship.
You don’t have to be at the mercy of your compulsive behaviors anymore. It might seem like that could never be the case for you. I was in your shoes at one point in my life, too. But I promise you, brother, if you stick to the system and follow through on each stage, you’re going to reach this point, too.