Automation Agency Concierge, Author at Elevated Recovery

How to Have High Energy During Your Reboot

Porn Addiction Counseling / By Automation Agency Concierge

Maintaining a high level of energy is an important thing for men who are high performers.

You need consistent energy levels to accomplish everything you need to do during the day. When you’re new to your reboot, though, you might notice that you feel exhausted at times. Or maybe you’ve been more tired than usual since you started working on overcoming your porn addiction.

Over time, your compulsive sexual behavior robbed you of your ability to recover energy. So much of your mental capacity is consumed either by actively engaging with your behavior or by thinking about it. You eliminate any healthy tools you can use to recharge and instead rely only on the mediocre sleep you get each night.

Human beings aren’t designed to only expend energy and sleep. You’re supposed to have other things you use to recharge your system aside from sleep. But when you destroy your mind and body’s natural functions with compulsive sexual behavior, you often eliminate those techniques from your life.

Having high energy is a requirement for men who want to perform well. What are some ways you can start working on your energy levels during your reboot?

Increase Your Energy Capacity

Recharging your energy levels doesn’t happen only by sleeping 9 hours per night or taking a long vacation every few months. These are helpful ways to ensure you don’t crash in the long run but they’re far from being the only effective tools for increasing energy.

Increasing your energy capacity is one way to have high energy during your reboot. Energy levels are a lot like a muscle – they’ll atrophy if you don’t work on or make use of them for a long time. If you want to have high energy levels, you need to build your energy capacity.

Think about the way the gym works. You don’t start out benching three plates on your first day; you start by using the barbell alone and then increasing the weight week after week. The same goes for increasing your energy levels during your reboot. You need to put in the same level of effort that’s required at the gym.

Energy Levels and Reboot Capital

You’ve likely read about reboot capital here on the blog or heard me talk about it in videos or on the podcast before. Building reboot capital in different areas of your life is crucial if you want to quit porn and be successful. This helps you increase your energy levels, too.

The three main areas of reboot capital that help you raise your energy levels are mental, emotional, and spiritual capital. You need to work on each of these three areas if you want to increase your energy capacity during your reboot.

To increase your mental capital, you need to push yourself mentally every day. This could mean you study or work for an extra 30 minutes than you originally planned to. You might read another chapter of the book you’re reading instead of playing on your phone before bed.

To increase your emotional capital, you need to put yourself in situations that usually make you uncomfortable. Perhaps you have a vulnerable conversation with your spouse that you might have been opposed to in the past. Maybe that means you report a slip or relapse to the Porn Addiction Counseling – Reboot group instead of keeping it to yourself.

To increase your spiritual capital, you need to incorporate some new mindfulness practices into your life. You could start meditating for five minutes each day for a week and then increase the time with each successive week. You may want to return to the church you grew up in or find a new faith practice that works for you in the present day.

Building Your Energy Over Time

Each of these small mental changes encourages a shift and increase in your energy levels over time. The more you care for your mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being, the more you can tolerate throughout the days, weeks, months, and years.

Before your reboot, it may have felt almost impossible to function after having a poor night of sleep. As you increase your energy capacity, though, you’ll find it easier to function under less than ideal conditions.

Ultimately, brothers, you must be willing to endure short-term discomfort in your mental, emotional, and spiritual life if you want to build the strength you need to succeed. Success doesn’t come without hard work. But every temporary moment of pain that you sit through makes you stronger in the long run and gives you the energy required to perform well.

How to Have High Energy During Your Reboot Read More »

Healthy Flirting vs. Dangerous Fantasizing

Porn Addiction Counseling / By Automation Agency Concierge

Today I want to write about a question from one of our brothers.

“Hey, J.K. I’ve been doing great so far with the Porn Reboot program but I want to know how to discern between healthy flirting and dangerous fantasizing. I’m currently talking to a bunch of women but not sure how to pursue things. Getting too sexual over text may cause me to relapse. Sometimes I’m not sure whether I’m leaning too far into the realm of my compulsive behavior or if it’s simply a genuine interest in a woman. How do I navigate those nuances?”

Do you ever find yourself in a situation similar to this? Are you concerned about where the line between healthy flirting and dangerous fantasizing lies? It might not be as complicated as you’re making it out to be, though.

Here’s the thing: I don’t see any nuances here.

This brother mentions that he’s talking to a bunch of women and worried about getting too sexual because of the risk of relapse. If flirting with women over text puts him in a situation that may lead to relapse, that should be a very clear boundary. He shouldn’t be texting sexually with women if he thinks it could result in a slip.

I want to point out two more important things in his question.

What is the purpose of flirting with a ton of women?

Why does flirting over text equate to things getting sexual?

Flirting with A Ton of Women

The first thing I recommend is getting clear about why he’s flirting with a lot of different women. I do want to mention that I see nothing wrong with having casual sexual partners. I went through a phase like that myself. I also think it’s risky to pursue relationships like this too early in your reboot, but there’s a place for it when you have more control over your behavior.

But it doesn’t sound like that’s what’s going on here. Our brother says he’s talking to a lot of women, not dating a lot of women. What is the purpose of talking with them? Is he trying to learn to become more intimate (the primary priority when rebooting) or is he only looking for sex?

Since he mentioned he’s worried about things getting too sexual I’m guessing that he’s looking for sex.

Again, it’s okay to have casual sex once you’ve rewired your brain. If you’re worried about relapsing because you’re flirting with someone, though, your brain probably hasn’t rewired yet. It might be a better idea for you to focus on building reboot capital in other areas for now instead of flirting with women.

Texting Getting Sexual

This brother also mentions his concerns about texting getting sexual. While texting doesn’t necessarily equate to things getting heated, that is something more common with flirting in today’s world. Sexting and sending explicit pictures have become the norm among men and women today.

This creates a problem for single men who struggle with out-of-control sexual behavior. You can’t conduct yourself like everyone else, brother. It doesn’t matter what everyone else is doing; learning to control your behavior should be your priority. This means that sexting, sending dick pics, and receiving naked pictures from women isn’t an option for you.

I’ve been in a relationship for 13 years and neither of us has ever sent an explicit picture to the other. I assure you it’s not because we’re conservative people but it’s because I set a hard boundary early on that it’s not something for me.

Even if you’ve been in a relationship with your partner for a long time, explicit texts are a slippery slope. Naked pictures and videos of your wife or your girlfriend still count as pornography. It doesn’t matter that you see her naked all the time; it’s the fact that it’s a digital image that gets you stimulated.

Texting isn’t inherently sexual but oftentimes it crosses the line into that today. If you can’t keep your text conversations conservative then you need to shift your priority to working on yourself some more.

Focus on Building Intimacy

Your porn use and compulsive sexual behavior destroyed your understanding of intimacy. Porn addiction effect is the furthest thing from intimate. It doesn’t portray the true nature of intimate sexual relations. Building intimacy is an important part of the Porn Reboot process and it won’t happen when you’re only focused on sleeping with women in the early stages.

It takes time, energy, and attention to build intimacy. It doesn’t come from a one-night stand. The more you spend time listening to the women you’re talking to and actually hearing what they say, you’ll build a stronger connection and a healthier relationship.

If you don’t feel like you’re able to build intimacy just yet, though, that’s okay. It comes with time and takes practice. You’ll learn to build these kinds of relationships the longer you stick with your porn addiction recovery. For now, spend some time with us in the free Facebook group and let us know what we can do to help.

Healthy Flirting vs. Dangerous Fantasizing Read More »

The Truth About Triggers

Porn Addiction Symptoms / By Automation Agency Concierge

There are three main approaches to traditional porn addiction recovery that I like to refer to as the “Big Three.”

They are the religious approach, the 12-step approach, and the therapeutic approach. Each of these works for different people based on personality, background, needs, and so on. However, they also tend to create obstacles where none should actually exist.

I have a hard time with the Big Three because each of them applies archaic and out-of-date methodologies to a very modern problem. For example, problems like alcoholism are relatively predictable. Alcohol has been the same substance for centuries. Flavors and brands may change but the substance itself remains the same.

On the other hand, porn addiction is a modern problem because it’s constantly evolving. What was mostly magazines and VHS tapes a few decades ago is now the most expansive library containing whatever you could possibly want to watch, anytime, anywhere. It’s not the same beast that it was 20 years ago, and it’ll be a completely different beast 20 years from now.

The way that high-speed on-demand pornography has rewired men’s brains is something else entirely. It creates changes that feel as though they’re permanent. Men watch their sexual preferences change as their pornography use progresses. They begin fantasizing about things they would have never imagined themselves attracted to before watching porn.

Applying one of the Big Three methodologies to your porn addiction recovery often neglects this reality. It uses old approaches that don’t take a comprehensive approach that’s required for your recovery. They focus more on porn use and less on the important tools you can use to overcome it.

For example, triggers are a hot topic in these traditional approaches. You’re taught to think that triggers are the main cause of your porn use and compulsive sexual behavior. There’s this belief that if you have a problem with pornography, you need to avoid any potential triggers that could lead you to relapse.

Leaning into this belief about triggers means that if you have a problem with pornography and see a scantily-clad woman that you’ll experience an uncontrollable urge and have no choice but to relapse. Do you realize how ridiculous that is?

I understand that triggers are a real thing and they do create a biochemical reaction that leads to arousal. Men experience a biological response when they see something sexual that falls within their arousal template. But the belief that you have no control once you’re triggered is absolutely unreasonable.

Accepting this belief means your life becomes a quest to avoid triggers. That’ll make you a wildly useless person, though, because triggers are inevitable. What are you going to do, shut yourself away in your house for the rest of your life?

You have a choice in how you respond to triggers. It might not feel like it at the beginning but you do. You lose control over that choice as you fall deeper into your pornography addiction and compulsive sexual behavior. But you can regain that control if you use the right system and approach.

That’s exactly what the Porn Reboot program is designed to do. It’s built to help you build a solid foundation for recovery and then equips you with the tools and skills needed to maintain what you’ve built. It’s not a program that teaches you that you’re a victim to circumstances and need to spend your time avoiding triggers. It’s a program that empowers you with the ability to recognize that pornography isn’t something you want as part of your life.

I’ve seen it time and time again with men who use our system. Over time they realize that they prefer not to watch pornography. They build a life that is so fulfilling and preferable to the way they were living before that the idea of watching pornography or engaging in those old compulsive behaviors again is abhorrent.

Whether you believe it or not, brother, you have a choice when it comes to your porn addiction symptoms and compulsive sexual behavior. Sure, compulsive behavior with pornography, sex, and masturbation is real but your response to it is one hundred percent your choice. And regaining that choice is the most important thing you could possibly cultivate within our system.

The Truth About Triggers Read More »

Be Mindful of the Therapist You Choose

Porn Addiction Counseling / By Automation Agency Concierge

A while back I posted a video about why some straight men watch gay or transgender porn.

It’s a common thing for men who start progressing in their porn addiction counseling use past the initial stages. But it creates a lot of confusion when men don’t understand why they’re watching what they’re watching. Until they learn more about porn addiction, some wonder whether they’re bisexual or gay.

I believe that most men who watch these genres of pornography aren’t bisexual or gay. Porn addiction is a progressive condition. This means that you need to seek increasingly intense or stimulating scenes over time to achieve the same effect. Gay and trans porn is oftentimes a part of this porn progression for many otherwise straight men.

A licensed clinical social worker (LCSW) commented on this video, though, with a different take. He said:

“I’m fully aware of and support your work, as well as the notion that pornography and other sexual behaviors are addictive. My theory based on my work, though, is that we live in a society where the majority of people are bisexual and a fringe number of people are either fully straight or fully gay. Many men who watch gay porn are likely part of this larger bisexual category.”

This worries me. I already have my opinions about men with porn addiction seeking help from most traditional therapists. The comment left by this LCSW on my video backs up my concerns and shows how misunderstood porn addiction still is.

Many therapists out there do not understand the concept of porn addiction. They see nothing wrong with men watching porn and masturbating daily. Sure, this might be fine for a normal man but men with porn addiction aren’t like other normal men.

It’s even more serious for men whose porn use progresses past “vanilla” porn. When they start looking for more provocative genres of pornography, insight from an uninformed therapist can be downright dangerous.

For example, some therapists (like the LCSW who commented on my post) will be quick to brand a man watching gay or trans porn as bi-curious at the very least. However, I’ve worked with hundreds of men who delved into these genres but are as straight as they come. Branding men who are already confused and vulnerable as their sexuality only complicates things further.

Professionally speaking, I’ll admit that every human being exists somewhere on the spectrum from straight to gay. I don’t believe that means the number of people who are either strictly straight or gay are the minority, though. Plenty of men can recognize the attractive aesthetics of another man without identifying as gay.

So, again, does watching gay porn make you gay? I’ve seen from my own experiences working with men addicted to pornography that this oftentimes isn’t the case. You need to cut pornography from your life and begin rebooting before you can make an honest appraisal of that, though.

Don’t get me wrong – there’s nothing wrong with seeking therapy. There are hundreds of men in the Porn Reboot program who also see a therapist to work through issues outside my scope of expertise. But they spent time vetting the therapist they now work with and ensured it was a therapist who understands the severity of porn addiction and the directions it can progress.

Seeking help from a therapist who doesn’t understand porn addiction won’t be helpful. They’re more likely to focus on your attraction to men than your issues with porn. From my experience, you need to address your porn issues and let your confused sense of attraction sort itself out during your reboot.

Be Mindful of the Therapist You Choose Read More »

Navigating Abstinence for Christian Brothers

Porn Addiction Counseling / By Automation Agency Concierge

Today’s post is for my Christian brothers.

While this is not a Christian system and nor am I a Christian, I do have a lot of Christian clients. I work with men who are ministers, monks, former monks, believers, and even pastors of megachurches. There are plenty of religious men who are part of the Porn Reboot group and I want to help these men today.

A brother asked,

“Hey J.K. I’m a Christian and I want to wait until marriage to have sex because I’m still a virgin and would like to save myself for my spouse. I also believe that masturbation is probably wrong. Is there anything different I should be doing if I plan to have absolute abstinence from all sexual contact before marriage?

“I’m also worried that my future spouse will have a lower sex drive than me. What is a good way to determine whether she and I will match in sex drive? How important is that overall, anyways? Thanks, brother.”

Again, while I am not a religious person and this is not a religious system, I fully support my Christian brothers. If you’re a Christian man who struggles with porn addiction problems, I understand what an overwhelming thing it can be. I hold no animosity or judgment for my Christian brothers and mean no disrespect to any religion here at Porn Reboot.

I want to break down this important question for you if these are some things you’re having a hard time with, too.

Is Masturbation Wrong?

This gentleman mentioned that masturbation is “probably” wrong. I hear that from a lot of my Christian and Muslim clients. They believe that masturbation is wrong but you can almost always hear the hesitation in their voice when they say this.

Here’s the thing, brother. You either believe in something or you don’t. You cannot believe that something is “probably” right or wrong. If you’re in this position, you “probably” don’t believe that’s the truth. Someone may have implied that it’s wrong, suggested that it’s temptation, or even explicitly told you that it’s wrong, but deep in your heart, you may not believe that.

At the same time, this half-belief creates a deep sense of guilt and shame. Once you’re addicted to porn and can’t control your sexual behavior, you’re left feeling like a sinner, like a weakling, like less of a man. You might believe that you’re going to hell for your actions.

In reality, though, you may not be as awful as you think. Your porn addiction might not be an addiction at all, either. You may be so conditioned by your religious beliefs to see yourself as a sick, compulsive, sexual person but realize after talking with us that your behavior isn’t as compulsive as you originally thought.

Sometimes we’ve even talked with Christian men who believed they had a problem when they showed up to the Porn Reboot group. After spending some time around the group, though, they realize their problem wasn’t as severe as they thought. They’re able to go about their lives with a newfound understanding of masturbation and come to terms with their natural, inherent, biological sexual drive.

Abstinence Before Marriage

Abstinence before marriage is a personal decision for every person. While I never recommend complete abstinence, nor is the Porn Reboot system based around it, I’ll never tell a man what he should do when it comes to his personal beliefs.

I have found that complete abstinence works for some men but not for others. We teach control over your sexual behavior and help you learn to manage your sexual urges. We also teach you how to accept yourself as a sexual being and that means we don’t recommend complete abstinence.

If abstinence is part of your religious convictions, though, you may want to leave these aspects of the Porn Reboot system aside. There’s nothing wrong with abstinence before marriage if that’s the path you choose to take but it will mean leaving behind some parts of the system that don’t align with your personal religious beliefs.

Sexual Repression

The biggest problem I notice among my Christian clients is the shift toward sexual repression. A lot of men who remain abstinent end up in the realm of sexual repression rather than rebooting. They believe that being free from porn and masturbation for a few years means they’ve successfully rebooted, but that might not be the case.

I hear from men with these porn-free years who find they still experience porn-induced erectile dysfunction. They haven’t acted out on their behaviors for years but still cannot achieve an erection naturally. Men who are in this position haven’t rebooted, they’ve only repressed themselves sexually.

While having sex isn’t a required part of the Porn Reboot system, we do require that you don’t repress yourself sexually. We need to find out what that looks like for you, especially if you’re choosing to remain completely abstinent until marriage. But when you fall into this space you’re still not fully rebooted and have some more work to do.

Differences in Sex Drive

This is a problem I hear often from men who choose to remain abstinent until marriage. The truth is, there’s no way for you to know what your future wife’s sex drive is like. You’ll never know until the two of you finally have sex.

At the same time, there’s also no way for you to know what your sex drive is really like either, especially at the start of your reboot. You are dealing with compulsive behavior. You do not know the difference between your actual sex drive and the urges you’re medicating with porn, masturbation, and sex.

You’ll only learn what your natural sex drive is as your brain rewires over time. Men who actively have sex during their reboot can learn about healthy sex sooner than men who choose to remain abstinent. You won’t have the opportunity to engage in any sexual behavior when you choose to remain abstinent, though, so you’ll miss out on finding out what your baseline sex drive is until you’re married.

Matching Sex Drives

The final part of our brother’s question asked whether matching sex drives is truly important. In my opinion, finding a partner whose sex drive matches yours is imperative. I think when you’re an individual who has successfully rebooted and wants to have a healthy sex life, your partner should want to have sex as frequently as you do.

Admittedly this is a deeper topic that I could expound upon in another post, the basics of it are the same. I do believe that partners should have similar sex drives otherwise this creates even more problems down the line. But if you choose to remain abstinent until marriage, you’ll never know whether you and your partner have matching sex drives until you get married.

Christians and Porn

Ultimately, brother, being a Christian and struggling with porn addiction recovery doesn’t make you a terrible person. I don’t believe it means that you’re going to hell or that you’re beyond saving. I know many Christian men who have overcome their compulsive sexual behavior and become incredible, stand-up members of society.

The choice to remain abstinent until marriage is yours alone. It’s not something that I recommend but I still know men who have been successful in their reboots while remaining abstinent. If you’re looking for some help with similar struggles, come check out the Porn Reboot Facebook group. You’re guaranteed to find another man who can share his experience with you and support you along the way, whatever you decide to do.

Navigating Abstinence for Christian Brothers Read More »

Why You Feel So Hopeless In Your Reboot

Porn Addiction Counseling / By Automation Agency Concierge

A lot of men come to the Porn Reboot program with severe limiting beliefs.

Many of these beliefs originate in childhood then continue developing as you age. They come from traumatic incidents, unhealthy relationships, repeated failure, and more.

The culmination of these limiting beliefs often results in an overwhelming feeling of hopelessness. Men arrive at the program worn out, beaten down, and broken, exhausted after years of self-deprecation and repeated inability to control their behavior.

You probably feel this way to some extent.

Maybe you’re thinking something to the effect of, “There’s no point anymore, I’m going to fail no matter what I do.”

I’m here to reassure you, my brother, that that’s not true. You may feel hopeless now but there is a solution in the porn addiction recovery system that can save you from your porn addiction problems and compulsive sexual behavior. Men who adhere to the system find themselves able to control their out-of-control behavior within 90 days and then continue to build better lives for themselves well into the future.

But you don’t have to worry about the future right now, brother. Let’s focus on the present and work through why you feel so hopeless in your reboot. Hopelessness is a feeling that stems from the belief that you’re stuck. You have no reason to feel positive expectations or move toward the future in your life. These beliefs keep you stuck in the same place, creating a downward spiral.

Four main elements create feelings of hopelessness:

Victim Mindset: Men with a victim mindset view life as happening to them. They believe that you’re standing on the side of the road watching things happen with little say in how they play out, encouraging feelings of hopelessness.
Irresponsibility: Irresponsibility ties into the victim mindset. When a man believes life is happening to him, he’s refusing to take responsibility for the aspects he can control. This refusal to take responsibility further instills hopelessness.
Blaming: A man who won’t take responsibility for his circumstances instead looks for someone or something else to blame. He believes he’s in his present situation because of his parents, partner, politics, or whatever else he can think to blame.
Powerlessness: Men who blame others for their problems put themselves in a position of powerlessness. Those who see themselves as victims, who won’t take responsibility for their situation, back themselves into a corner with no clear way out.

These four elements combine to create an overwhelming, looming sense of hopelessness. It causes men to lose drive, energy, and motivation. They no longer have hope for the future because it feels like there’s nothing they can do that will make a difference.

Does this sound familiar?

Thankfully there’s a solution to that looming sense of hopelessness. It starts with recognizing that you are responsible for your life. You determine how things go. Sure, you might not have control over certain aspects of life but you have full control over how you respond to them.

It’s up to you to make the adjustments necessary to change your life.

Start by asking yourself questions that will shift your thinking and perspective.

“How am I causing this?”

“What am I doing to make this my reality?”

“What am I pretending not to know to keep things the way they are?”

These are far better questions than asking yourself why things are happening “to” you.

These questions also encourage self-reflection and your answers give you actionable steps to take, helping you realize that you’re anything but stuck.

Once you take ownership of your life and begin applying solutions, you start to reclaim the control that you spent years giving away. You’ll experience small wins here and there that encourage you to keep going. You’re going to notice your life taking a new direction and likely find that things play out differently than you always expected they would.

As you take responsibility for your life and recognize the areas you can change, your feelings of hopelessness diminish. You’ll feel hopeful for the future when you see just how much say you have in your life. You’re no longer at the mercy of whatever happens; you take your power back and decide how you’re going to respond no matter what may happen.

I understand that you may feel hopeless now, brother, but those feelings will change. You won’t feel stuck forever. Seeking help on porn addiction counseling asap. It’s difficult to arrive at the Porn Reboot group and recognize how much work there is to do but it’s also empowering to know that you have the power to shift your life.

Are you ready?

Why You Feel So Hopeless In Your Reboot Read More »

Should You Trust Me?

Porn Addiction Counseling / By Automation Agency Concierge

Today I want to respond to a concern that I receive from time to time.

I get it in responses on my YouTube videos, comments to the group, and even direct emails from time to time. It may be a question you’ve even thought to yourself before. I never want to assume no one else has this thought aside from those few who bring it up so today I want to address it.

The comment in question reads:

“How can we trust you when you take so much money upfront for your training? Is it a classic narcissistic trick to exploit vulnerable people and then blame them if they fail? I’m not trying to be negative or anything but it’s a genuine concern that I’ve had with you.”

Here’s the thing: you don’t have to trust me. You don’t have to trust anyone, honestly. Anyone who’s followed me for a significant amount of time knows that I say assume B.S. with everything. Second-guess all of it. Whether it’s a podcast, a YouTube video, or an email in your inbox, question anything you see until you know it’s proven to work.

Here’s the other thing: my entire system is free. It’s free on YouTube. It’s free on my podcast. It’s free here on the blog, too. I recently wrote an in-depth set of posts on the stages of the Porn Reboot system as an update to the set I wrote a few months ago.

Of course, these things aren’t tailored to your experience or personalized for you; it’s a general outline of how the Porn Reboot system works for any man who wants to use it. It’s the system I used to overcome my out-of-control behavior with porn and masturbation over a decade ago. Since then, I’ve worked with hundreds of men who used this same system to overcome their behavior, too.

You don’t have to join the Porn Reboot intensive group if you don’t want to. You’ll find none of my necessary content hidden behind a paywall. Everything you could need to overcome your porn addiction and compulsive sexual behavior is available on my site, my YouTube channel, my podcast, and my free Facebook group. I don’t charge for any of it.

The system doesn’t change whether you’re in the free group or the Porn Reboot intensive group. The path to rebooting remains the same regardless of which avenue you choose to take. The stages of the Porn Reboot program don’t look any different once you become a paying member of the group.

The difference is that the Porn Reboot intensive is for men who want to take the extra step with their reboot. They want ongoing accountability, regular support calls, and access to an exclusive group of high-performing men working to control their out-of-control behavior.

They aren’t the trial rebooters who browse my free content but never truly apply these concepts and practices in their lives. The men in the intensive take themselves and their compulsive behavior seriously and back that intensity with their actions.

We deliver results to men whose behaviors cause them to lose much more than the fees we charge. From the relationships they destroy, the careers they tear apart, the business deals they lose out on, what they have to lose far outweighs the cost of the Porn Reboot program.

I have dozens of high-performing men who come to the program looking for help with little concern for what the cost may be. I work with CEOs on the edge of blowing massive business opportunities. I work with men in line for life-changing promotions that may miss it because of their out-of-control behavior. I work with fathers who are at risk of losing their families because of their behaviors.

Men in these situations think less about the cost of the program and more about the results it will get them. The things they have to lose are worth far more than the price tag attached to the Porn Reboot intensive group. Our program fees are a small price to pay compared to the things on the line for these men.

Here’s another way to look at it: you wouldn’t question why the doctor who treats your cancer charges what he does. Most extensive treatments and surgeries cost more than a person’s life savings. Hospitals charge enormous amounts to provide their services but you wouldn’t hesitate to pay them, you’d seek treatment and then figure it out.

Men who qualify for the porn addiction recovery intensive are looking to treat their porn addiction problems with the same sense of urgency that people with life-threatening illnesses have. They’ve reached a point where their out-of-control behavior is life-threatening in one way or another, whether in terms of their livelihood, their family, or their life itself.

I was at this point when I finally had enough. I knew that if I didn’t do something to get my behavior under control that I was going to destroy everything. I paid the price for a professional intervention because I had reached a place where I was almost gone beyond recall.

If you haven’t reached these types of depths in your porn addiction counseling then you’re a lucky man. There’s a chance you may reach it later on down the road if you don’t find a way to end your behavior. But you might not need to become a member of the Porn Reboot intensive to do that.

Plenty of Porn Reboot brothers never become paying members in the intensive and still overcome their behavior. They use the content I provide for free and do the work without making excuses. They’re the same type of determined men who join the group but didn’t join for one reason or another, yet they still learned to control their behavior with the Porn Reboot system.

So no, I don’t think you need to trust me. I think if you’re even asking yourself that question then the Porn Reboot intensive isn’t for you. I’ve shared plenty of success stories on my YouTube channel and within the Facebook group for you to know that it works. If you don’t think it’s worth the cost, though, then the Porn Reboot intensive group isn’t right for you.

Still, I welcome you to read some more blog posts, listen to the podcast, watch some videos, and join us in the free Facebook group. Even if you don’t trust me I’d love for you to see what Porn Reboot is all about. I want to help men just like you whether you’re paying me or not. Because helping men get their lives back is where I find my true success and purpose.

Should You Trust Me? Read More »

Rebooting vs. Recovery: Choosing a Path

Porn Addiction Recovery / By Automation Agency Concierge

I’ve often used the word “recovery” when writing here on the blog, speaking in YouTube videos or podcasts, or other Porn Reboot spaces.

I use the term for ease of communication when I talk about overcoming your porn addiction and compulsive sexual behavior.

It’s a familiar word that’s now commonly associated with the process of overcoming addictive behavior. This makes it easy for the largest number of people to understand what I’m talking about.

At the same time, I do believe it’s important to distinguish between what happens in traditional recovery approaches and what happens with the Porn Reboot system. What we do here is not the same thing you’ll find in the majority of other recovery modalities.

Recovery takes you back to what is familiar. You’re eliminating your addictions to regain the life you had before. Sure, some might take it further and build a better life than the one they had while using substances. But most people stick within the bounds of what society expects from them.

There’s nothing wrong with this approach. It still leads to a decent life. If you’re not interested in launching yourself to the next level then recovery is the best thing for you. You’re probably well-suited for a traditional rehab program, 12-step group, or religious group.

On the other hand, rebooting is exactly what it sounds like. It’s restarting your entire life. It’s refusing to settle for what you had before and crossing over into a new life. It’s also refusing to limit yourself to what society expects from you but pushing past those confines into what you want to make out of your life instead.

Men who are successful in the Porn Reboot system are men who fall into the second category. They want to step outside the bounds of the traditional. They tend to be high-performing men. These include guys who are artists, business owners, entrepreneurs, and more. They’re men who will not hold themselves back from everything possible.

The porn addiction recovery system requires a lot more from you than a traditional recovery approach does. When you come to the Porn Reboot program we ask you to change your entire life. You’re encouraged to build up areas that you may have never considered pursuing before. We want to trigger a transformation of your entire being, not just one aspect of you.

This means you’re going to have to say yes to the unknown. You must be willing to admit you know much less about yourself than you think you do. You need to be ready to have the truth about yourself revealed and to take action once you discover it.

One of these truths is the understanding that your recovery or your reboot is not part of your identity.

This is something that I see in traditional recovery communities all the time. People embody their recovery as an identity and find themselves wrapped up in something that never ends.

Once an addict, always an addict, right?

Sure, you have a problem with porn and compulsive sexual behavior. It’s a serious problem, too, otherwise, you wouldn’t be here. But you are not your porn addiction. You are not your out-of-control behavior. It’s a problem you deal with but it is not a part of you.

The Porn Reboot system will never ask you to embody your porn problem as part of yourself. We also see ourselves as a tool for you to use but not a crutch for you to rely on. After you reboot successfully, you do not need Porn Reboot anymore. You don’t need to keep coming back week after week to rehash old problems.

That’s the point of rebooting – you reboot and you move on, you don’t reboot and stick around forever. And that’s also what separates Porn Reboot from traditional approaches to recovery. We want to get you reconnected with life and back into the world, not sitting in rooms for the rest of your life talking about your identity as an addict.

Recovery may be similar to rebooting, but rebooting is so much more than recovery.

You’re welcome to take whichever avenue seems most suitable for you. You might not want to do all the work that’s required for a successful reboot. But those who do decide their problem is severe enough and are willing to do the work will be rewarded with a life far greater than they ever imagined possible for themselves.

So which avenue will it be for you, brother?

Rebooting vs. Recovery: Choosing a Path Read More »

Impostor Syndrome and Porn Addiction

Porn Addiction Symptoms / By Automation Agency Concierge

I have a confession to make.

After working with men battling porn addiction symptoms for some time, I reached a point where I started working with individuals who are quite successful. I came into contact with a lot of men who had achieved quite a bit in their lives and because of my experience in the sales organization I worked for, I knew how to work with these men.

When I transitioned into coaching full-time and started working one-on-one with clients operating at a high level in their professional lives, it became a balancing act of managing expectations and judgments that come with the territory. Some elite clientele such as CEOs of large companies, pastors of megachurches, and celebrities can put exhausting demands on you.

I’ve always loved the challenge of working with these individuals. I love helping them through their unique situations and challenges because of their particular positions. At the same time, it doesn’t stop me from experiencing impostor syndrome from time to time. I look at the complete loser I was during my early twenties and wonder how it is I arrived where I am today.

Something I’ve noticed while working with my high-level clients, though, is that they feel the same way. They feel like impostors in their realm of work. They believe at times they aren’t smart enough, are insufficient, are lacking, and that they aren’t worthy of their success, too.

It’s difficult for men who either actively live with or who have overcome a porn addiction symptoms to let go of who they used to be and step into the man they can become or have become. This results in men feeling like frauds even long after they’ve overcome their compulsive sexual behavior and pornography addiction. Does this sound like you?

One way men compensate for feeling like impostors is by striving for perfection. They shift their energy into chasing perfectionism in hopes that they will paint over their past imperfections. While this may seem like a logical solution it only makes things worse. Perfectionism is a false ideal. It’s elusive. It’s impossible to achieve because it doesn’t exist.

Trying to outrun impostor syndrome through avenues like perfectionism slaps a temporary solution over the underlying problem. There’s still the little voice in your head that tells you you’re a fake, you’re a fraud, you aren’t good enough, you’re going to relapse, and you’re going to let yourself and everyone you love down.

There are more effective ways to confront and keep your impostor syndrome at bay. The two methods I use most in my own life are mindfulness and emotional behavioral therapy. Like I admitted earlier, I still deal with impostor syndrome from time to time but the feelings are much less intense today than they were when I first started.

If mindfulness and emotional behavioral therapy sound too “woo-woo” for you you can use other approaches. Write out your thoughts and behaviors regarding your impostor syndrome on paper and honestly ask yourself whether the beliefs you hold are rational or irrational. Are you holding yourself to an unrealistic standard or expecting too much from yourself?

Incorporating practices like these alongside your work in the Porn Addiction Recovery Reboot system will slowly erode your impostor syndrome over time. Sure, it may creep back in occasionally but you’ll develop the tools and skills you need to keep that voice quiet more often than not. If I can do it, brother, so can you. And the silence that comes as a result of the work is deeply rewarding.

Impostor Syndrome and Porn Addiction Read More »

The Difference Between Porn Addiction and Other Addictions

Porn Addiction Symptoms / By Automation Agency Concierge

Today’s topic comes from a few questions brought by a brother to our intensive group.

The Porn Reboot Intensive Group is a group of high-performing men who are serious about controlling their behavior with sex, porn, and masturbation. They aren’t trial rebooters or half-in, half-out – they are dedicated to doing the work required to make a change.

I don’t often share responses to these questions outside of the Intensive Group. It’s a high-level group for only those who truly want to control their behavior. But this brother’s questions are of real importance to our everyday brothers, too, and I’m choosing to share them with you today.

“In opiate addicts, the brain is flooded with external opiates which stop the brain from producing natural opiates. This is part of what causes the extreme withdrawals that these addicts experience when they try to get clean.

“Does the same apply to dopamine and porn addiction? Is recovery partly about satisfying the natural chemical deficit until it reaches its original levels? Is this what defines your timeline of up to two years for a successful reboot? And are there different activities that satisfy specific neurotransmitter deficits?”

Substance Addiction vs. Behavioral Addiction

This brother is comparing a substance addiction (opiate addiction) to a behavioral addiction (porn addiction). While the concept is the same, they’re two different forms of addiction which mean withdrawal is a bit different.

With porn addiction, your brain only has access to natural opiates during the moment you orgasm, but that’s it. It releases some other chemicals in the process too, like dopamine and norepinephrine. But you’re more addicted to the process of reaching that point (porn and masturbation) than you are to the climax at the end.

This is why you do things like run multiple tabs, progress in the genres of porn you watch, and even edge for hours. You’re not as concerned with the orgasm as you are with the process that gets you there. Sure, there’s a mild case of chemical deficit like our brother mentioned but the chemical reaction in your brain isn’t what you’re pursuing.

This is what makes porn addiction a behavioral addiction. Rebooting isn’t about overcoming the addiction to dopamine and norepinephrine, it’s about overcoming your addiction to consuming alarming amounts of pornography. An effective reboot involves breaking the relapse cycle and changing the habits, lifestyle, self-image issues that trigger your addiction in the first place.

Two Years to Reboot Success

He also asks about the two-year timeline for the Porn Reboot process. As may already know, it takes about a year and a half to two years for men to successfully rewire their brains. I say successfully rewire the brain because rebooting is about much more than simply quitting porn and controlling masturbation. If you make no changes beyond this you’ll end up relapsing again.

This is another reason porn addiction differs from substance addiction. For some addicts, eliminating the substance eliminates the problem as a whole. For most porn addicts, removing porn is only a small part of the entire equation. It takes a systematic approach to build the resilience and self-efficacy needed to be successful in your reboot.

The two-year timeline is based on my 10 years of experience working with men who struggle with porn addiction symptoms and masturbation. I have a lot of data gathered from every man’s progression through the different stages of the program. I’ve since used that data to inform the two-year timeline I talk about in the Porn Reboot system.

Neurotransmitter Deficits

Our brother’s final question addressed targeting specific neurotransmitter deficits. Again, his question frames things from the perspective of substance addiction instead of behavioral addiction. While you do experience certain deficits in neurotransmitters, that isn’t the main problem we’re focusing on.

At the same time, the porn addiction recovery system does address the habit and lifestyle changes necessary to reboot. We don’t look at it from the standpoint of addressing particular neurotransmitter deficits, though. The changes you make in the Porn Reboot system address the problematic behaviors that lead you to relapse.

Our system encourages you to change your morning routine, exercise regimen, nutrition, supplementation, relationships, behavior with technology, and more. We offer a curriculum and a pathway to make these changes and over time you’ll notice an incredible shift in your mindset and outlook on life.

The Reboot Recovery Difference

The Porn Reboot system asks a lot more of you than traditional approaches to recovery. At the same time, we deliver a lot more than those traditional approaches, too. Eliminating pornography and compulsive sexual behavior is only the start of the process. Recovery from pornography addiction in the Porn Reboot system dives much deeper than that.

If you follow through with the system, though, you’ll undergo a complete change in your view of yourself, your family, your friends, and the world around you. You’ll eventually lose the drive to view pornography because you realize how much better life can be without it. The quality of recovery you develop through the Porn Reboot system is unlike anything you’ve tried before, brother. Join us and experience it for yourself.

The Difference Between Porn Addiction and Other Addictions Read More »

Discover 7 Secrets To Eliminate Porn Addiction Forever

Automation Agency Concierge

How to Have High Energy During Your Reboot

Increase Your Energy Capacity

Energy Levels and Reboot Capital

Building Your Energy Over Time

Healthy Flirting vs. Dangerous Fantasizing

Flirting with A Ton of Women

Texting Getting Sexual

Focus on Building Intimacy

The Truth About Triggers

Be Mindful of the Therapist You Choose

Navigating Abstinence for Christian Brothers

Is Masturbation Wrong?

Abstinence Before Marriage

Sexual Repression

Differences in Sex Drive

Matching Sex Drives

Christians and Porn

Why You Feel So Hopeless In Your Reboot

Should You Trust Me?

Rebooting vs. Recovery: Choosing a Path

Impostor Syndrome and Porn Addiction

The Difference Between Porn Addiction and Other Addictions

Substance Addiction vs. Behavioral Addiction

Two Years to Reboot Success

Neurotransmitter Deficits

The Reboot Recovery Difference

Get instant access to my weekly newsletter

Where I Share My Best Tips On Recovery From Your Porn Or Sex Addiction!

100% Privacy. No Spam.

Recent Posts

My Last Year of Coaching

Digital Temptations: Psychological Insights and Techniques to Stop Porn Addiction

Reclaiming Intimacy: How to Stop Porn Addiction and Foster Genuine Connections

Empowering Yourself: Practical Steps to Stop Porn Addiction and Regain Control

Beyond the Screen: Holistic Approaches to Overcoming Porn Addiction

Breaking the Cycle: Comprehensive Strategies on How to Stop Porn Addiction