Addictions are destructive to those suffering from them, and equally so for their partners and their relationship.
If you have a partner who’s struggling with porn addiction, here are some ways that their habit has affected your relationship:
- The sex has reduced in quality or disappeared from the relationship. There’s no connection, or your partner seems completely absent.
- Your partner’s spending too much time alone online. He’s isolating himself often and it’s become habitual.
- He’s become very critical and judgmental of different aspects of your life. This can include your physique, lifestyle, and many other things he previously never commented on.
- You feel like your partner’s set unrealistic standards for you and that no matter what you do, you’re never good enough for him.
- He’s developed new sexual interests, maybe becoming rougher in bed or desiring sexual acts that didn’t interest him before.
- Your partner’s become much more private and secretive. He changes passwords on his devices and never leaves them around you.
- There are inconsistencies in the stories your partner tells you. And when you call him out on it, he acts overly defensive about that.
- He’s become detached and cold. You feel that your partner’s much more distant and it’s become obvious that there’s no connection between you.
- Your partner won’t directly acknowledge that there’s a problem or he starts blaming it on something else.
- Sometimes, when you reach out to him, he flips the conversation on you and accuses you of being overly emotional, needy, or nagging.
If you’ve seen these symptoms in play and you’re pretty sure that your partner has a problem with pornography, there’s one crucial question to answer:
What do you do next?
There is good and bad news about the situation.
The bad news is that you can’t make anyone overcome or stop their addiction. They need to go all-in themselves.
And the good news is that there’s nothing wrong with you and fixing your partner’s issues isn’t your burden.
The best thing to do is set clear boundaries and stop yourself from going all-in. Shelter yourself from being hurt and stay level-headed.
That’s how you’ll manage to sort through the situation.
