Mental energy is a vital component of your daily life.
You need to organize your day to focus on important tasks and fulfill your responsibilities. It takes a certain amount of mental energy to get through your day and accomplish everything you need to do.
When you struggle with compulsive behavior with porn, sex, and masturbation, though, you’ll notice low energy levels from time to time. That sense of mental exhaustion makes it difficult to complete the things you need to get done.
If you’re here reading this I’m sure you’re familiar with that feeling.
That mental exhaustion is inconvenient especially if you’re a high-performing man. Overcoming your out-of-control behavior and taking back your life is a lot harder when you’re tired all the time.
What can you do to manage your mental energy during your reboot?
Why Do You Have Low Energy?
Before you can effectively manage your mental energy you need to know what keeps it low. Porn addiction and compulsive sexual behavior keep your mind active almost all the time. Whether you’re thinking about your behavior or engaging in it, your mind is constantly consumed with it.
The negative emotions and negative self-image caused by your behavior also consume your mental energy. Men feel immense guilt and shame about the pornography they watch, the things they do, and the slips that happen when they try to quit. The cycle is exhausting.
Sound familiar?
There’s also the general exhaustion that comes with staying up late when you act out. You might try to go to sleep on time but end up blowing it by staying up all night watching porn. Of course you’re going to feel depleted when you get terrible sleep.
Your exhaustion takes sense from a biological standpoint, too. Years of compulsive sexual behavior destroy the reward system in your brain. Eventually, you need something extra exhilarating to get the dopamine release you’re looking for.
Ultimately, your mental energy is drained in every capacity.
Embracing Realistic Optimism
As you start working on your mental energy drain in your reboot, I suggest incorporating a practice that I call realistic optimism. Realistic optimism is when you accept the reality of the world with a positive, optimistic attitude, regardless of whether things are positive or negative.
That doesn’t mean you deny the reality of your situation. You must recognize that your compulsive behavior impacts every area of your life: your work, your family, your spirituality, your finances, your potential, and more. All these things experience at least some sort of fallout from your behavior but realistic optimism means you remain hopeful in the face of it.
Realistic optimism also is not a passive take on your life. It’s not sitting back and trusting things will work out without putting anything into it. Realistic optimism requires action. It means that as you take action, no matter how your life looks right now, continue believing that things will turn out well in everything that you do in every area of your life.
Taking Steps to Manage Your Mental Energy
It’s not easy to incorporate the things needed to manage your mental energy. Developing these strategies and adopting them is challenging during the beginning stages of your reboot. You first need to control your immediate behaviors before any of these steps can be effective. Once you have a hold on your more pressing behaviors, try these steps out.
Implement Positive Self-Talk
I know this might sound a bit woo-woo to some of you but don’t knock it until you try it. You may think it’s simplistic but the way you talk to yourself has a massive impact on your mindset. If you spend the day telling yourself that you’re a terrible person, it’s going to affect the way you see yourself. When you believe that you’re a terrible person it’s harder to overcome your harmful behavior.
For example, consider how you talk to yourself when you slip. Do you call yourself weak or a loser, or do you view it as a mistake and encourage yourself to make a different choice next time? The second view is far more productive than the first view. Practice talking to yourself this way instead.
Practice Visualization
Again, I know some of you guys think these things have no ground but I want you to try them before you discredit them. It’s an approach I’ve found very effective in my own experience and it’s helped me not only in my reboot but in other areas of my life.
Think about a point where you felt shame and humiliation. Call that memory to mind and notice how you can still feel it to this day, you get visceral feelings as if it’s still happening. This physiological response to visualizing something in the past is powerful.
The power of visualization runs deep. Your brain cannot differentiate between a vividly imagined experience and something you experienced in reality. It works with things in the past so why shouldn’t it work with things in the future? Take that power of visualization and direct it forward. Visualize yourself successfully overcoming the things currently blocking you.
Learn Effective Time Management
Effective time management is a crucial component of any successful reboot. It’s something that can be difficult to gain control over, especially at the beginning. You’re used to following whatever drive and desire come to mind. They’re usually things that pull you down into a dark spiral of out-of-control behavior.
Practice effective time management instead. This doesn’t only apply to work or your general responsibilities but it’s about getting these things done and still finding enjoyment in them. Learning to manage your time while enjoying it will leave you far more likely to stick with your schedule.
It Won’t Happen All At Once
The biggest mistake I see men make is in expecting drastic results. They think things are going to change in big ways right away, not thinking about the many years it took to reach this point. You didn’t develop your addiction and compulsive behaviors in a few weeks or months; you’re undoing years of conditioning.
Your behavior won’t change immediately and you’re not going to fix all the damage you caused all at once. You’re still going to have your head on a swivel at the beginning or you might objectify women at times. incredible damage their behavior caused along the way. Looking at the reality of that destruction is painful but maintaining realistic optimism while working on your reboot will help.
Come join us over in the Porn Reboot Facebook group and let us know which tips were most helpful for you. If you’re struggling to keep from slipping, the support you’ll find in the group makes a massive difference. Join us today!