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Defeating Apathy While Quitting Porn

Porn Addiction Counseling / By J.K Emezi

I’ve had countless brothers in the group who insist on counting days.

Anyone who has been around the Porn Reboot program for a while knows how I feel about counting days. Still, some men hold onto their streaks as though they’re a helpful or meaningful approach to overcoming out-of-control behavior.

After nearly 15 years of working with men trying to end their behavior with porn, sex, and masturbation, though, I know this tactic doesn’t work. Counting days only builds expectations and apathy. Expectations for what your life “should” look like after a certain point and apathy when that time arrives and it doesn’t look that way at all. Counting days is an arbitrary marker that offers no meaningful insight into progress.

Consider a couple that has been married for 40 years. Sure, from the outside looking in it may seem like they have all the answers. After all, they’ve stayed together this long, right? But what if their marriage isn’t a happy one? They may have amassed a few decades alongside one another but that doesn’t mean their marriage is successful.

Or take a man with a 20-year career making six figures per year. You would assume that after all this time he has an incredible savings account, a hefty investment portfolio, and can retire comfortably. However, if he’s done nothing to be intentional with his money, he’ll be far worse off than you might think. Many men with decades of six-figure incomes have nothing to show for them.

The same applies to counting porn-free days. You can collect days, weeks, months, or years, but they’re worthless if you do nothing to better yourself. There’s a reason the Porn Reboot system is more intensive than other approaches; we provide you with a path to a fulfilling life.

You’ll gain nothing from quitting porn without taking any steps to better yourself in other areas. Quitting porn does not automatically bolster your social life, broaden your career opportunities, or strengthen your relationships. All it does is provide you with more free time that was once occupied by countless tabs and endless videos.

What will you do with all of that time?

Defeating apathy while quitting porn requires intention. You can’t stop porn addiction problems and expect your life to get better without putting in any work. Counting days does nothing to bring about change. You have to put in the work to shift your perspective and build the life you want to live.

This intentional approach is one of the first steps to overcoming the sense of apathy that settles in after you quit porn. And it doesn’t happen immediately. You can’t expect to join the Porn Reboot program and notice a difference by next Wednesday. You have to commit to the process and trust that you’ll find freedom, much like other men who have come before you.

It may seem impossible to escape your sense of apathy but I promise there’s a solution. It might take time to relinquish your old thought patterns and embrace this new way of thinking, but the time it takes will be worth it. You’ll be shocked at what you can accomplish in only a few short months of intentional practice. And if you’re going to quit porn anyways, why not do it in a way that offers the most promising outcome?

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Clarifying Masculine Traits: Embracing True Strength

Porn Addiction Counseling / By J.K Emezi

I believe there are many misconceptions surrounding the concept of masculinity today.

Articles about dark masculinity or toxic masculinity have made their way into thousands of publications. I think this has created a ton of misunderstanding of what true masculinity is.

I’m not saying that there are no harmful men. There are plenty of toxic individual men, but that doesn’t make masculinity toxic as a whole. Men who didn’t have strong male figures in their lives and no one was there to help them control and channel their energy. This lack of guidance led these men to hurt and harm others, creating the idea that all masculinity is toxic.

But masculinity in and of itself is not a negative thing. Many positive things have come from strong masculine traits. I want to outline some of these traits, so even if you lack a positive male figure in your life, you can begin cultivating and strengthening these traits.

Courage

Courage is the baseline of every masculine man. It means doing something despite your fear. Courage is what led to colonization, civilization, and triumph over evil. It’s a necessary trait because you need to take action even when you’re fearful. You can’t allow your fears to hold you back from doing what’s right and pursuing the life you want to lead.

Strength

Strength is a crucial masculine trait that you must embody. This includes physical strength, emotional strength, and psychological strength. You must be able to defend yourself and your loved ones. You must be able to maintain an even emotional keel when you feel stressed, frustrated, or annoyed. And you must be able to persevere through tough times.

Independence

Independence of thought and action are important masculine traits to embrace. Men should have the confidence to think and act for themselves. You shouldn’t allow others to sway you from your beliefs. That doesn’t mean you should act in an echo chamber and disregard constructive criticism. But it does mean that you shouldn’t let others do your thinking for you.

Leadership

Leadership is another vital masculine trait. However, too many men have an incorrect idea of what leadership means. Being a leader doesn’t mean controlling other people. It means guiding others by example and commanding respect as a result. And even if you aren’t a naturally born leader, it is something you can learn to become over time.

Consistency

Consistency is the final trait I want to emphasize today. Anyone can express courage, strength, independence, and leadership occasionally. True masculinity requires consistency. The more you practice these traits, the more you’ll embody them over time. Men who are consistently courageous, strong, independent leaders are necessary for a successful society. No one can stop you once you learn to be consistent with your actions.

Embracing Masculinity

Your masculinity is an inherent part of who you are, not something to be stifled or rejected. But embracing a healthy balance of masculine traits can feel challenging at first. This is especially true if you’re a man who didn’t have a strong male role model growing up. But it’s an important part of the reboot process.

As you move through the Porn Addiction Counseling, you have plenty of opportunities to work on these masculine traits. They all add up to a successful porn addiction recovery. If embracing masculinity is new to you, I recommend picking up a copy of The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi. It’s a fantastic work that outlines the importance of masculinity and why we need strong men in the world. There’s nothing toxic about masculinity, brother; it’s what you do with those traits that determines who you are.

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When Should You Seek Porn Addiction Counseling?

Porn Addiction Counseling / By J.K Emezi

What do you think of when you think of getting help for mental health problems?

If you answered counseling, you’re like the majority of people throughout the country.

Counseling is the go-to solution for a wide range of mental health struggles. From depression and anxiety to bipolar disorder and substance use disorder, counseling is a primary form of treatment. Working through problems in a safe environment where you can express your deepest thoughts is a crucial part of healing.

It would make sense to think that porn addiction counseling is a go-to method for overcoming compulsive problems with porn and masturbation too, right? While many people seek the help of counselors, therapists, and psychologists for their porn addiction, I don’t fully agree with the practice.

Look through any medical journal and you’ll still find a plethora of conflicting opinions on the “validity” of porn addiction. Some clinicians suggest that pornography addiction isn’t really an addiction at all. They propose various other explanations for this type of compulsive behavior.

Some people who seek porn addiction counseling receive a much different service than they anticipated. I find that too many therapists dig too deep into underlying causes while neglecting to put enough focus on porn itself. How does counseling for pornography addiction typically work for people struggling to control their porn use?

Porn Addiction and Mental Health Treatment

Mental health treatment still seems to have mixed views and beliefs about pornography addiction. For example, the World Health Organization confirmed compulsive sexual behavior as a mental disorder in 2019.1 Although they did not specify porn addiction as a diagnosis, they do refer to repetitive sexual behaviors.

However, the American Psychiatric Association continues to reject compulsive sexual behavior as a diagnosable condition in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5).2 The DSM is the psychologist’s version of the Bible, yet it still does not recognize porn addiction, or general compulsive sexual behavior, as a “real” problem.

Should You Seek Porn Addiction Counseling?

The same confusion and mixed beliefs are rampant in the counseling community. Many brothers who are part of the Porn Reboot program initially sought a solution from therapists and counselors. They believed that a counselor could help them with their problem, and understandably so.

However, porn addiction counseling often turns out to not be the same helpful solution it should be. Counselors dig into root causes and often derail men from receiving an actionable solution. This is especially important for men struggling with illegal or harmful genres of porn or compulsive sexual behaviors.

During the years of working with men to help them overcome their compulsive sexual behavior, I’ve found that immediate action is often necessary. The root causes and deep-seated issues can be handled at a later date; their porn addiction and the fallout it’s creating is the most pressing issue in the beginning.

Porn Addiction Counseling Alternatives

As clinicians continue disagreeing on the truth of porn addiction, it holds people back from the help they desperately need. Thankfully, there are some alternatives to porn addiction counseling that seem to be more effective.

One option is porn addiction recovery groups, such as 12-step groups. These programs outline a path of recovery from porn addiction, as well as other substance and behavioral addictions. While they are not my preferred method for overcoming porn addiction, they do help thousands of people every year.

Online communities are another form of finding support when trying to overcome porn addiction. Oftentimes these groups are filled with people using methods like NoFap or semen retention. These forced abstinence approaches are somewhat closer to a more effective approach, but I still find they miss the mark in providing actionable help for lasting results.

Porn Reboot vs. Porn Addiction Counseling

The Porn Reboot program is the only thing that has helped me in my journey to end my out-of-control behavior with porn, sex, and masturbation. Porn addiction counseling and therapy weren’t helpful. NoFap proved unsuccessful. I tried the willpower method, too, and failed every time.

I developed the Porn Reboot system through my own experiences by trial and error. I assessed what worked and what didn’t, and developed a system from it. I realized that all efforts to control my porn addiction problems through willpower were of no use. I needed to work with my body instead of against it.

This led to the Porn Reboot system that’s used today by thousands of men. It has helped men end their behavior with porn, sex, and masturbation. It has equipped them with the tools to rebuild the lives that porn addiction stole from them. It has enabled them to develop strong relationships, perform in exceptional careers, and become standup members of their communities.

The Porn Reboot system can help you, too. If you’re wondering whether porn addiction counseling is for you, I invite you to join us in the free Porn Reboot Facebook group. Find out what we’re about and see whether our approach may work for you, too. We’ll ensure you never need to struggle alone again, brother; we’ll be here every step of the way.

References

National Center on Sexual Exploitation. (2019). World Health Organization Confirms Compulsive Sexual Behavior Disorder to be in ICD-11.
Addiction. (2016). Diagnosis of hypersexual or compulsive sexual behavior can be made using ICD-10 and DSM-5 despite rejection of this diagnosis by the American Psychiatric Association.

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Does Your Reboot Need to Be a Priority?

Porn Addiction Recovery / By J.K Emezi

I recently had a one-on-one with a brother who brought up a very interesting point I want to cover here today. This brother is in the middle stage of his reboot. He’s doing well in most aspects of his reboot but still struggles to control his behavior with porn and masturbation.

However, he’s so focused on his slips that he can’t see all the progress he’s making in other areas. No matter what positives I pointed out, he couldn’t recognize the improvements in his career, his relationship, and his finances. He firmly believed that unless he was completely and totally free from porn, no other improvements mattered.

As we talked, it came up that in the past he came across Gary Wilson, one of the early greats in the realm of porn addiction. If you aren’t already familiar, he’s the one who developed concepts like “Your Brain on Porn” and “NoFap.” While I have great respect for the work he did to bring awareness to the detriments of porn, he and I differ in a few areas of thought.

One of the primary differences between our views on porn addiction recovery is his abstinence-only approach. His programs focus so heavily on a man’s porn addiction problem that they neglect to see the importance of simultaneously building up other areas of your life. They didn’t talk about things like relationships, social life, financial well-being, physical health, and mental health.

This led our brother, and thousands of others like him, to view his slips as meaning his entire reboot was a failure. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t blowing his paychecks the day they arrived, that he wasn’t neglecting his girlfriend, or that he was finally showing up to work on time. No, the few slips here and there meant the whole reboot was unsuccessful.

I don’t adhere to that thought. I’m not saying that you should continue watching porn, jerking off, and having compulsive sex during your reboot. The whole point of the Porn Reboot program is to rewire your brain so you can separate from these out-of-control behaviors. I am saying that putting all the emphasis on porn and ignoring progress in other areas is a recipe for disaster.

Yes, your reboot needs to be a priority. But when I say your reboot, I mean the whole reboot process. I mean building physical, social, emotional, mental, and spiritual reboot capital. I mean your morning routine, meditation, journaling, and getting to the gym. I mean spending time with your partner, being a good employee, and checking in with your accountability partner.

All of these things are just as important as whether you view porn or not. Do you know why? Because if you only based your success on whether you slipped or relapsed, you would destroy your self-esteem.

You’re here because of your problem with porn, sex, and masturbation, brother. You won’t end those things all at once right away. You spend years developing those habits and it will take at least a few months to end them. As I often talk about, even though I don’t support “counting days”, it takes at least 90 days to reboot and up to two years to fully rewire your brain.

Men with high self-esteem are less likely to act out sexually than men with low self-esteem. If you don’t measure success in these other areas alongside your compulsive behavior, you will feel like you’re a failure. We want to build your self-esteem, not tear it down. And incorporating your reboot capital as a benchmark of success is a crucial way to do that.

There was no Porn Reboot system when I worked to end my out-of-control behavior. My experiences were the original case study for the program. While I couldn’t quit watching porn and jerking off, I knew there had to be other things I could do in the meantime. Trying to measure my success by my time away from porn made me feel worse and worse.

Instead, I first focused on building my physique. I was 21, tall, and lanky. I felt weak. I didn’t feel attractive. But I recognized that there were more resources on building a strong physique than quitting porn, so I started there. I stuck to a meal plan, lifted weights progressively, and within 90 days my body began to change. Within a year I put on some significant size. And the reactions from people boosted my confidence. I still struggled with my out-of-control behavior, but I finally had something to feel proud of.

Then I shifted my focus to my social anxiety. I was so uncomfortable around people in public, both men and women, and knew it was something I needed to overcome. So I began the process by interacting with people at the bar to learn to hold conversations. As I learned to converse, I started asking some of the women I talked with on dates. It was a slow process but my progress was as evident as it was when working on my physique.

I didn’t stop working on controlling my behavior with porn during this time. I still dealt with slips and relapses, but they became less frequent as I gained confidence. I realized that by focusing on things other than porn, porn naturally became less of a problem. This led to my concept for the Porn Reboot system that thousands of men use today.

So again, brother, yes, your reboot needs to be a priority. Your compulsive behavior with porn, sex, and masturbation brought you here. Obviously, things are not going well and you want to control your behavior. But I encourage you to make your entire reboot a priority, not just the aspects that have to do with your porn problem.

I watched the process work for myself and the many men I’ve worked with during the years. You’re far from alone in dealing with this struggle, brother. You’ve landed among a community of men who know exactly what you’re going through. If you haven’t already, I invite you to join our FREE Porn Reboot Facebook group. Start there and read through some experiences. You’ll find others rebuilding their lives, from work to relationships to their physique and more.

Come join us on our Porn Addiction Counseling as we make our reboots a priority in all aspects of our lives.

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Positive Aspects of Porn Addiction

Porn Addiction Counseling / By J.K Emezi

I know that probably sounds crazy, doesn’t it?

Positive aspects of porn addiction? How could something so detrimental to your life and the lives of your loved ones have anything positive to it? What could possibly be a benefit of porn addiction?

It’s not difficult to understand why porn addiction is a bad thing. I’m guessing you didn’t arrive at this channel because your life was going great. It doesn’t matter whether you’re addicted to alcohol, cigarettes, or pornography; addiction in any form is detrimental to your wellbeing.

Porn addiction and compulsive sexual behavior have the power to destroy your life. They deteriorate your mind, shatter your relationships, break down your career, and more. You don’t have to look very far to see the negative effects of pornography. The same goes for any other addiction you may struggle with.

However, you can’t overcome porn addiction by only looking at the negative aspects. You must also recognize the positive aspects of porn addiction. I know this might sound a little nuts, especially coming from a guy who dedicated his life to helping men end their compulsive behavior with pornography. But stick with me for a bit.

Most men who struggle with porn usually started watching it when they were younger. By the time they reach their teenage years it’s a fully-established problem. That was my personal experience, too. I was first exposed to pornography when I was eight, and I was a full-blown porn addict by the time I was 13.

Although I don’t recommend that young men begin watching porn, I now see the positive aspects that porn had when I was young. There were some beneficial parts of my porn use, despite the long-term destruction it caused.

Porn became my go-to coping strategy for dealing with the difficult emotions of being a teenager. It helped me handle stress and provided me with comfort when things felt out of control. Porn also taught me about sex and helped me understand what it was. It allowed me to learn about myself sexually during those formative adolescent years.

After I crossed a certain point, though, I wore out the positives of my porn use. While it was useful to a certain extent, it wasn’t helpful in the long run. From then on my porn use became more and more habitual, harmful, and destructive.

When you only view porn as a horrible, awful, negative thing, it further instills feelings of guilt and shame that keep you trapped in the porn addiction effect cycle. You can’t force yourself to overcome your behavior by fighting it with willpower. Your brain doesn’t work that way.

Instead, recognizing the positive parts of your porn use and realizing why you started using it in the first place will help you. You’ll see that while it started innocently enough, it grew to become something much more detrimental than you ever intended it to be.

You’re not a bad person because of your out-of-control behavior, but you do need to take responsibility for it and make a change. Take this reframed understanding and use it to your advantage. This small perspective shift may be the key to helping you move forward in your porn addiction recovery.

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Your Porn Addiction and Self-Esteem

Porn Addiction Effect / By J.K Emezi

High self-esteem is a vital part of a successful reboot, but men typically aren’t feeling esteem able when they first become a member of the Porn Reboot system.

Porn addiction problems cause a serious lack of self-esteem. Today I want to help you understand the importance of self-esteem and its role in the Porn Reboot process.

I often speak about self-esteem here on the blog, in videos on our YouTube channel, and during podcasts. As men who struggle with a compulsive problem with porn, sex, or masturbation, our self-esteem tends to be low when we decide to quit. We hate ourselves, we’re filled with guilt and shame, we believe we’re weak, and we tell ourselves that we’re pathetic.

Unless you rebuild your self-esteem, you’ll always find yourself struggling to maintain your reboot. You’ll never see yourself as a man who can live free of your compulsive sexual behavior if you don’t address your self-image. What can you do to work on your troubles with self-esteem?

The Basics of Self-Esteem

First, you must understand what self-esteem is. Self-esteem is basically the way you feel about yourself. It’s based on your self-image and how you view yourself. For example, if you see yourself as a pathetic, porn-addicted man who can’t overcome his behavior, it contributes to a low sense of self-esteem.

However, if you recognize that everyone makes mistakes, that you have the power to overcome them, and that you’re working to become a better man, this gives you a stronger sense of self-esteem. Additionally, your self-esteem consists of a few different aspects: identity, competence, and self-confidence.

Identity

Human beings naturally feel the desire to belong to something. Your identity is made up of two parts: your identity within a group and your identity within yourself. At a group level, your identity is defined by the people you surround yourself with. This includes your family, friends, colleagues, and community. At the individual level, identity involves all of your characteristics, both positive and negative. To improve your self-esteem, you must accept yourself as you are or work to change the aspects that hold you back.

Competence

Competence means trusting your abilities to do or not do something. It involves an understanding of your capabilities, limitations, and desire to learn new things. You won’t feel very great if you don’t believe that you’re capable of anything. On the other hand, if you believe in your abilities then you’ll have a deeper sense of self-esteem.

Self-Confidence

Self-confidence is the primary fuel for your self-esteem. Your sense of security, both personally and with those around you, contributes to how you feel about yourself. Confident men also have high self-esteem. Building up your self-esteem relies primarily on building up your self-confidence.

Self-Esteem in Extremes

Not all self-esteem is equal. You should strive for balance rather than leaning too heavily to one side or another. Going to extremes on either end, whether you have too much or too little self-esteem, isn’t a healthy place to be.

For example, some men have very high self-esteem but don’t realize that it isn’t grounded in anything. They have an overly-inflated sense of self that exists solely within their perception. They lack concrete evidence to feel as confident as they do. They may believe they’re strong, wonderful, capable people but don’t truly have a reason to.

Then you have men with very low self-esteem who tend to tear themselves down every chance they get. These men also carry a similarly unrealistic view of themselves but are at the other end of the spectrum. They believe they can’t do anything right no matter what they try and are vocal about their negative self-image.

Healthy Self-Esteem

A place of healthy self-esteem exists somewhere in the middle. You don’t want too much or too little self-esteem. Healthy self-esteem means you are grounded in your sense of self. You know exactly who you are, where you want to be, and what you want to do.

It empowers you to make better choices in every area of your life. It informs the direction you need to take so that you can arrive at your intended destination efficiently and enjoyably. You learn to make smarter decisions about who you spend your time with and which activities you participate in. When you operate from a place of healthy self-esteem, you naturally surround yourself with people who understand you and do things you enjoy doing.

Healthy self-esteem is also important because you’re more willing to try new things, meet challenges, address your insecurities, and face your fears. It increases your sense of resilience so that judgment or rejection from others does not concern you.

As you work on your porn addiction problems, your sense of self-esteem will grow. The Porn Reboot program is a porn addiction recovery method that is designed to help you rebuild your self-image, gain self-confidence, and create a life worth living that keeps you from returning to your compulsive behaviors.

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S.Y.S.T.E.M.: Building Lasting Change

Porn Addiction Counseling / By J.K Emezi

Systems are one of my favorite things to talk about.

Whether it’s on our YouTube channel, the podcast, during calls, or here on the blog, the importance of a system is something I can never stress enough. I firmly believe that all lasting change begins and ends with a system.

There is a great acronym that I use when talking about systems. A system is:

Something
You
Stick
To
Emphatically (and)
Methodically

Every system is based on a primary goal: you want predictable and improved results. Developing a system, or the same actions repeated over and over again, is the most efficient route to those predictable and improved results.

Many men confuse the end goal, thinking that the repeated actions will provide the same results over and over again. But the key phrase here is predictable and improved. It outlines something you’re working towards that you’ve never experienced. Sure, you have an idea of where you will end up but you don’t know what exactly that looks like.

A system lays out the most efficient path for you to take on the way to a result. While you may know what that result should be, chances are you might end up with something better. And if you continue adhering to that system, those results will continue to improve over time.

When you find something you stick to emphatically and methodically, the results will be unimaginable. You’re going to unlock new possibilities, opportunities, and experiences. You’ll find that you’re capable of more than you ever thought possible.

However, when you first arrive at the Porn Reboot Program, sticking to a system may feel impossible. You’ve spent years doing what you want to do when you want to do it. Developing the discipline necessary to stick to something emphatically and methodically takes practice and time.

You’ll probably find that implementing the entirety of the porn addiction recovery program – The Porn Reboot system is too big a challenge at the beginning. Instead, I recommend starting with one non-negotiable. Pick one part of the system that you will adhere to without fail. Maybe it’s reading in the morning, writing in the evening, or going to the gym.

Decide which aspect you can best stick to and do it every day for two weeks. Make sure it’s non-negotiable, and that no one can talk you out of it. This means your wife or girlfriend, your friends, your kids, or your job. You must ensure that it doesn’t impede your time in these areas; you cannot neglect these things for the sake of your non-negotiable. It must be something you add to your existing responsibilities, not something that takes away from them.

Once you pick that first something you stick to emphatically and methodically, choose another thing. As you stick with that thing, find another thing. You’ll find that implementing more aspects of the system becomes easier over time. You develop the necessary discipline without realizing it, and the results you receive make you more willing to further implement that system.

The Porn Addiction Counseling Reboot system is outlined specifically to help you not only overcome your behavior with porn, sex, and masturbation but to help you rebuild your entire life. We want you to grow in all areas of your life, not just end your porn addiction. The system we offer outlines a clear path to progress as long as you’re willing to stick to it.

You’ll never stick perfectly to a system, but as long as you try you’ll find that your results are predictable and improved every time. After you recognize the benefits of a system, brother, you’re never going to search for another path to progress again!

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What Are Some Porn Addiction Symptoms?

Porn Addiction Symptoms / By J.K Emezi

Pornography is a difficult topic for people to discuss.

It’s an uncomfortable thing to talk about because it’s usually a private activity. Many people feel embarrassed about watching porn, even if it’s infrequent or they only watch “vanilla” videos. Some may even deny that they watch it to avoid judgment or misunderstanding.

But despite being a taboo topic, porn is an increasingly commonplace part of society. According to top website ranks, three separate porn sites are among the top 20 most-visited websites. Some even see more traffic than other popular sites like Amazon, Netflix, TikTok, and Reddit. About 2.4 million people access these top three sites every minute.1

High-speed internet porn has created an alarming problem in society. It’s difficult for researchers to collect exact data given the subject matter, but that doesn’t make it any less severe. Millions of people likely struggle with a secret porn addiction that seriously affects their lives. Just do a quick Google search and read the comments yourself.

How do you know when porn becomes a problem? Learning to recognize porn addiction symptoms is the first step. What are some of the symptoms of porn addiction that suggest your use may not be as casual as you think? And what can you do if you find that you’re experiencing some porn addiction signs?

Porn Addiction Problems

The term porn addiction is slightly misleading. It’s difficult to profile because use differs from person to person. Porn addiction problems aren’t as straightforward as someone who struggles with alcohol or drug addiction. It isn’t the same type of physical addiction as these substances. This leads to widespread misunderstanding and misconceptions about porn addiction.

Many people think it is something that can be easily controlled. After all, it seems pretty simple, right? Just don’t visit those sites and the problem is gone. But it’s not that easy for someone struggling with porn addiction. It’s just as challenging to overcome a compulsive porn addiction problem. Porn addiction symptoms make it clear that compulsive porn use isn’t as controllable as it seems.

Symptoms of Porn Addiction

It’s easy to find yourself trapped in the “I can quit when I want to” thought cycle. It’s a telling sign for anyone struggling with addiction of any kind. It may seem like you’re in control of your actions but in reality, you’re stuck in the vice grip of modern-day high-speed internet pornography.2 Some porn addiction symptoms include:

Porn becomes the central focus of your life; if you aren’t watching porn, you’re thinking about watching it
Avoiding or neglecting tasks and responsibilities at work, home, or school
Struggling to build healthy relationships with people (especially women)
Using porn to cope with negative emotions like sadness, anxiety, or depression
Engaging in risky behavior to watch porn (i.e. watching it at work)
Feeling shame, guilt, or frustration about watching porn but continuing to do it anyway
Experiencing porn-induced erectile dysfunction (PIED)
Watching increasingly extreme types of pornography to achieve stimulation
Trying to quit watching porn and finding yourself unable to

Understanding some of the porn addiction symptoms is only the first part of the solution. Knowledge without action does nothing. The problem will continue until you’re ready to move beyond knowing how to stop porn addiction and take the steps to change your life. And Porn Reboot can help.

Porn Addiction Effects

But clinicians and researchers are making moves to expand public understanding of porn addiction. Categorized as a behavioral addiction, porn addiction can be just as destructive as these other forms of physical dependence. It can lead to similar experiences, such as the destruction of relationships, loss of employment, financial ruin, and more.

One of the primary effects of compulsive porn use is porn addiction withdrawal. This includes things like porn-induced erectile dysfunction. It takes time to work through and overcome porn addiction effects, but the sooner you learn how to stop porn addiction, the sooner you’ll begin returning to normal.

How to Stop Porn Addiction

Thankfully, the statistics listed above are proof that porn addiction problems are more common than you may think. If you or a loved one struggle with porn addiction, you’re not alone. The condition leads to fear, shame, guilt, and isolation. Asking for help for porn addiction is not easy. But the first step in how to stop porn addiction is asking for help.

Thankfully, communities like Porn Reboot exist. Porn Reboot is a proven system to help you overcome your porn addiction problems and find freedom from out-of-control sexual behavior. Our system outlines a step-by-step solution to compulsive porn, sex, and masturbation. But we don’t stop there.

Our porn addiction recovery program which is the Porn Reboot system believes you are more than your porn addiction. Ending your behavior with porn is only the beginning. The Porn Reboot system helps you rebuild and re-engage with life in a way you never dreamed possible. If you’ve tried to quit porn before and haven’t been successful, stick around. We have plenty of resources available to help you get started.

References

Similarweb. (2022). Top Websites Ranking.
Medical News Today. (2021). What to know about porn addiction.

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Impatience is Not a Virtue: Embracing Patience in Recovery

Porn Addiction Counseling / By J.K Emezi

Two of my biggest problems early in my porn addiction recovery were my lack of intolerance and my impatience.

I’ve noticed the same problems in many of the clients I work with, especially when they begin their reboot. It’s not a good thing when you want everything right now and when you need it to go your way.

Oftentimes this extends to wanting people to behave the same way you do. This creates a lot of frustration because people will never act exactly how you want them to. People are usually predictable to a certain extent, but you can never fully know what someone is going to do.

Intolerance and impatience are two of the most detrimental roadblocks to a successful reboot. I know this from experience because my impatience caused me to lose at least a few big opportunities in the past. I had to learn to let things play out the way they’re supposed to instead of the way that I believe they should.

Life doesn’t operate on your timeline; it operates on a timeline independent of your thoughts and feelings about it. Fighting against life only leads to frustration and disappointment. You must learn to detach yourself from expectations of all kinds.

Learning patience is a necessary skill in this type of porn addiction counseling. You’ll find that you don’t get everything you want the moment that you want it. This applies to work, to relationships, to developing skills, to success in your hobbies, and more.

You can’t go out and expect things to change the moment you decide to do something. It takes time for change to take place. This means you likely won’t overcome your out-of-control behavior right away, which I make sure to emphasize in the Porn Reboot program.

It also means that the first woman you date during your reboot likely isn’t “the one” you’ve been waiting for. It means that you won’t bench press three places during your first few weeks in the gym. It means that you’re probably not going to be the star player in your rec league when you start playing.

But if you learn to be patient and stick with things, you’ll find that the results become more incredible as time passes. The more patience you have with the process, the more you’ll grow. If you develop the ability to carry out consistent actions you’ll be shocked at the things that will happen.

The old adage is right: patience is truly a virtue. It’s not easy to be patient at first but learning the skill will make a massive difference in your life. This is true for anything you set your mind to, from your reboot to your relationships to your career to your gym routine. No matter what you do in life, learning to be patient with the process will make all the difference.

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The Power of Forgiveness in Recovery

Porn Addiction Recovery / By J.K Emezi

What comes to mind when you hear the word “forgiveness”?

Perhaps you recall the religion of your childhood. Maybe you think of a resentment you’re trying to let go of. You might even think of someone you’re hoping will forgive you for something you’ve done.

I believe that forgiveness is a forgotten skill. It empowers you to overcome some of the things that hold you back most in your porn addiction recovery. Holding onto anger keeps you a prisoner of your emotions. But learning to forgive provides the freedom you’ve looked for in many different avenues up to this point.

Are you harboring any grudges over things said or done to you in the past? It’s difficult to reach the later stages of your reboot if you don’t let go of those past harms. However, I understand that it’s challenging to release these things which is why I believe that forgiveness is a skill.

Take a moment to recall some of the worst times of your life. Think of some of the worst things you said and did during your porn addiction. If you’re anything like me, I said and did many things that caused a lot of harm to other people. My words and actions resulted in much emotional, physical, psychological, and financial damage.

I also found that I was holding onto a lot of grudges. I was so angry at others for the way they treated me despite the awful things I did. I was angry at women who rejected me and friends who said things behind my back. It didn’t matter that I’d hurt them, too; I was still furious.

It’s safe to say I had a lot of baggage when I finally decided to end my out-of-control behavior. I had to release some of the weight I was carrying if I wanted to reboot because I was at a point where it was too painful to carry on. While forgiveness was the last thing on my mind, it wasn’t until later that I realized letting go of these things meant I was beginning that process.

Forgiveness begins with you, brother. It starts with forgiving yourself for the harmful behavior you’ve engaged in for so many years. Learning to do this frees you from the heavy load of guilt and shame you’ve carried for so long. As you truly embrace forgiveness for yourself, you’ll find a lightness in the world that you never imagined possible.

Once you forgive yourself, it’s time to start extending that forgiveness to others. Think about all the people you’re carrying grudges against or felt resentment toward. Call each grudge and resentment to mind one at a time. Consider whether it’s worth it to continue carrying it or if it’s time to forgive, let go, and move forward.

Oftentimes people believe that forgiveness is for the other person’s sake. I’m here to tell you, brother, that forgiveness is for you. It’s a process that frees you from the mental strain of carrying all this frustration, rage, and resentment. These things take much more energy to sustain than you may think.

At the same time, this doesn’t absolve you of responsibility for the harm you’ve caused. You must still acknowledge your wrongdoings and make restitution to those you hurt. A simple “sorry” is often not enough; it’s time to make genuine amends.

But this won’t come until you learn to forgive others, which starts with forgiving yourself. It takes time to develop this skill but it’s necessary if you want to be successful in your Porn Addiction Counseling or Porn Reboot Program. You will never overcome your out-of-control behavior if you don’t learn the art of forgiveness. But as you continue working on yourself, your ability to forgive will develop and grow.

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Discover 7 Secrets To Eliminate Porn Addiction Forever

jk emezi

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Independence

Leadership

Consistency

Embracing Masculinity

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The Basics of Self-Esteem

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Self-Esteem in Extremes

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